I originally made the account to post kinky porn stories. I should get back to that.
Open to lewd and non-lewd interaction. DM's open.
I don't cancel anyone without receipts.
who i used to be Show more
i used to be [email protected]@masto.host. i was accused of things i didn't do. i want to move past it.
homestuck Show more
tbh i think the most character-defining moment in the whole comic is when the first video game that john can think of is crash bandicoot
work joke Show more
CC my bosses in emails all you want; they give less of a shit than i do
weight negative Show more
every person who hasn't seen me in a while, when they see me again: "WOW you've gained weight!"
christmas kvetching Show more
I hate the question "What do you want for Christmas?"
If I can think of something I want, I'll just get it.
If you can't think of something I want, just don't get me anything. I won't be insulted.
they're all great jorbs, brornt
workposting, silly Show more
customer agreement names that sound like a really weird split 7-inch: "YOLO/BOAT GLOVES"
i wish i were asleep
Penis envoy
Just took a really epic nap
porn music is always written in the key of G string
#catte
CW: cat eye contact
the weather is so nice today
this is basically the hottest thing i've ever seen (and yet, not lewd)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wAQ7autd61g
It's a nice evening
a hearty thank you to the one person who voted and voted nah
should i finish blowing leaves before it gets too dark?
Are baby boomers killing the telegram industry?
If I'm sitting on the back porch, it must be time to complain about all the shit my neighbor's shitty palm trees drop in my back yard.
language that makes the the horniest based solely on how it sounds (only if the speaker is a dom(me)) Show more
german
language that makes the the horniest based solely on how it sounds Show more
french
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